Big Questions for Big Impact
As we navigate the intricate journey of parenthood, it's inevitable that we encounter profound questions about our roles, our beliefs, and the futures we hope to cultivate for our children. For those of us who know our own cultural conversations well, there are wisdoms to draw from when it comes to parenting.
What do I believe is the meaning of the lives we lead, and what is our role in this world?
How does parenting become part of my community story?
What matters for my child, and all children, in this world as we continue to grow our collective potential?
What do I want my child to hold in mind most?
But, in the chaos of everyday life it’s easy to set these questions aside, even if we value their importance. It can seem like a luxury to wonder about big questions when we really need to convince a 4-year-old to brush his teeth.
Yet, what if we viewed these questions not as burdensome unknowns, but as opportunities for growth and connection with our children? What if we embraced the idea that our reflections on these questions hold the key to making the most significant impact on our children's lives? For example, teaching a 4-year-old why we brush our teeth can help him understand the importance of hygiene and healthy living throughout his life. It’s a deeper conversation than just “do this because I told you so.”
From guiding them through peer conflicts to shaping their understanding of friendship and resilience, every moment presents a chance to delve into the deeper meaning behind our actions as parents. It's not about guaranteeing specific outcomes or meticulously planning every step of their journey, but rather about instilling in them the values, wisdom, and resilience they need to navigate life's complexities with confidence and compassion.
Take action:
Open up a new document or the notes app on your phone and spend 10 minutes musing about the questions mentioned above.
As you allow yourself time to think through these big questions, you’ll be able to more easily connect those big “whys” with how you actually go about parenting. When we can connect our actions to our beliefs, something as simple as brushing our teeth can suddenly take on a much deeper meaning. Fostering these conversations not only allows us to lay a foundation where our children are equipped with practical skills, but also with the wisdom and resilience to thrive.
Can you name what you value most?
Naming the values that we hold at our core is something we at Convo like to call finding your “heartsong”. Do you know yours? Finding your own heartsong can help you better see and nurture your kids’ heartsongs in action.
Sign up for our free 5-Day Finding Your Heartsong Challenge and receive daily emails packed with science-backed knowledge, resources, and prompts to help you define what you value the most.
Dr. Erika Bocknek, founder of Convo, is a former university professor, family therapist, and mom of 3. She has spent 20 years cultivating expertise in the science of parenting, child development, and couple and family therapy. A well-regarded expert and a superfan of the power of nurturing families for healthy development, Dr. Erika is passionate about bringing science to children and families’ everyday lives.